When Do I Need to Send My Wedding Invitations?

When you’re planning a wedding, timing is a really important factor. It can be tricky to know exactly when to book vendors, when to throw engagement parties and bridal showers and when to send wedding e-invitations. Once you’ve booked your venue and set a date for your wedding, you may be wondering, ‘how soon is too soon to send out the invitations?’. You don’t want to wait too long and have guests unable to attend due to prior commitments, but is there a rule for how far in advance you can send out the invites? Read on for everything you need to know on wedding invitation etiquette and when to send what!

What are save the dates and are they really necessary?

Simply put, save the dates announce your wedding date to your intended guests and ask them to keep the date free. They are a nice way to say – ‘pencil us in, don’t book anything else on this day because we’re getting married, more details coming!’ Whilst not absolutely essential, sending out a save the date can be very useful for weddings at certain times of the year. If you’re planning your upcoming nuptials around the peak summer wedding season then the earlier you can let your guests know the better. You don’t want to be double booked with your second cousin twice removed. Same applies if you’re marrying at another busy time of the year when families may be planning holidays. Also think about whether your guests need to book time off work or organise child / dog care, sometimes they need to do this a long time in advance.

When should I send save the dates out?

To get the most benefit from sending save the date cards, we'd suggest sending them as early as is practically possible. As soon as you have locked in your date and secured your wedding venue, you are good to go. Anytime from eight months to a year before your wedding is ideal. The earlier the better if you have international guests coming to give them time to make those all important travel arrangements.

Destination weddings

Destination weddings require more notice because they require more planning. Depending on the location of your ceremony and reception, most guests will need to arrange additional things in good time such as buying plane tickets, renewing passports, booking hotel rooms, arranging a hire car or child care. Expecting guests to travel far afield is a big ask so if you can, give them plenty of time to firm up their plans.

So, when should I send out save the dates and wedding invitations for a destination wedding?

For those reasons above, it’s best to send out a save the date card for a destination wedding approximately 12 months before your wedding date. Then send out destination wedding invitations out as soon as possible, but no later than 9 months before the big day. That’s enough time to get a hotel room, even at more popular destinations, ensuring your friends and family can be by your side when it’s time to celebrate.

But if I'm going full digital, do the timings differ?

Not at all, you can start creating your wedding website as early as you want. But the most popular time to share the URL is on the save the date cards. You don't have to have everything locked in by then, that's the beauty of a website for wedding planning, you can keep updating it as plans solidify. In fact, at Say I do we offer everything you need to go fully digital with your wedding stationery, including being able to create a fully customisable website for your wedding. Send your save the date cards, wedding e invitations with digital RSVPS and thank you cards all with the same theme - who said sorting out your wedding invitation suite was hard, hey? Creating your stationery digitally will help you save money and save time.

When should I send out wedding e-invitations?

There are two different timelines to send invitations depending on whether you have sent save the dates. If you haven't sent save the dates, you should send wedding invites out four to six months prior to your wedding date. If you have sent save the dates, your formal invitations should be sent out at least eight weeks before the wedding date. As a general rule wedding invites shouldn't be sent with less than six weeks until the wedding, and for out of town guests who need to travel far, we'd recommend even longer than eight weeks so they can book leave from work, accommodation and make travel arrangements.

What to include on my wedding invitations?

It may sound obvious but during this time you'll have a lot of information whirling around in your head, so make sure the following important details are included on the main invitation. Your names, guests’ names, the wedding date and time, venue information and RSVP requirements including an RSVP date. Now this is where a wedding website comes in SO handy. It's the perfect place for those extra details that you might not want (or have room) to put on the invite such as gift registry information, whether children are invited and local accommodation information.

What not to include on my wedding invitations?

Tread carefully with language around whether children are invited or not. If the latter, write something along the lines of, 'We are sorry that we are unable to accommodate children at our wedding' or 'We would like our special day to be an adult-only occasion'.
Don't include too much information. Don't overwhelm your guest list with too many details that could be put on the website for wedding information. Other elements such as the dress code, maps and song requests can all be included on your website too. Always double check for spelling mistakes/typos, your invitations are setting your guests expectations for your upcoming event so the least you can do is spell their name correctly!

Who should get an engagement party invitation and when to send them out?

Who you invite to your engagement party depends on what type of party you’re hosting, and if you’re having more than one. Yes, engaged couples can have more than one! With family members located in different cities or different friendship groups, it’s common for the happy couple to have multiple smaller engagement parties to make sure everyone can get involved with the celebrations. Invite yours and your partner’s immediate family. Plus, any extended family you plan on including on your wedding guest list. Invite any close friends and loved ones of yours or your partners who you are planning to invite to the wedding to your engagement party. Typically, unmarried or single guests will want to bring a date or a plus one to the party. A good rule of thumb is to let guests bring a plus one if they will also be given a plus one at the wedding. Otherwise, stick to wedding guests only.

What about rehearsal dinner invites?

You should send your rehearsal dinner invitations at least six to eight weeks before the event. This will give guests enough time to figure out their schedules and make arrangements for attending. However, if you're having a destination wedding or you choose a location that requires travel it's best to start sending these invitations about four months prior or at the same time you send your wedding invitations.

When should I send bridal shower invitations/bachelorette party invites?

Bridal shower and bachelorette party invitations should be sent way before the event. You want to give at least 6 weeks prior notice. That way if people are travelling they will have enough time to plan and make the necessary arrangements. You should have sent your wedding invitations out by the time you get ready to send the bridal shower invitations. In fact, ideally wedding guests should have received their wedding invitation and have RSVP’d by the time you send out bridal shower invitations.

When should I buy and mail thank you cards?

You'll more than likely be returning from your honeymoon, unpacking gifts, and setting up your new life together post-wedding. But don't forget to send out your thank you cards! You typically have up to three months to send out your wedding thank you notes. Whether you're sending digital thank you cards or paper, this is enough time to undertake planning, writing and getting to the post office.

Who should get a thank you card?

Anyone who gave you a gift – whether that was an engagement party gift or a wedding gift, a cash gift towards a honeymoon fund, or something from the wedding registry. You may have thanked the gift-giver in person on the day of your wedding but you should still send a personal thank you note as well. If you can, mention in the thank you card what present they gifted and how you plan to use it. This is a thoughtful way to let the individual guest know how much it meant to you. This is especially key for those that were particularly generous in their gift-giving. There's a lot that goes into planning your dream wedding day but hopefully you feel a little less confused about wedding invitations and timings now. Every wedding is unique, so remember to stay true to yourself and plot out a timeline that works for you.